I have recreated and reproduced a real admitted Plan II and regular McCombs student’s application and essays. Sharing one full applicant portrait will offer a glimpse of one way to be successful in UT’s review process. Rather than reading individual essays, it also helps to see how the student’s resume and essays connect with one another to make a persuasive argument for deserving a space in Plan II honors and business.

At the end of this post, I assess their potential Personal Achievement Index score on a scale of 1 to 6. Since one hundred reviewers will read the same application slightly differently, not everyone is going to score each application the same. I provide theoretical score probabilities and my best guess of what they received in practice.

If you want to learn more about how reviewers read and review applications, I recommend my comprehensive UT admissions guide Your Ticket to the Forty Acres for an in-depth look at the admissions scoring process.

Check out my new book Surviving the College Admissions Madness and Youtube Channel

Background and Resume Highlights

Family: Large suburban high school, college-educated family, upper/middle income, white, female

Academics: Top 13% with a 1560 SAT (790m / 770v), Academic Index 3.54 / 4

Resume Summary: Drum major Junior/Senior, Wind Symphony Sophomore-Senior, various Solo/Ensemble first places, Spanish Club Founder, two part-time jobs, more than ten art awards including a state competition, 200+ volunteering hours

Essay A Tell Us Your Story

 “I love you mom.” I handed over my Crayon stick-figure family drawing like a proud, preening peacock. Dad stood tallest in my blended family portrait. I pointed here and there and jabbered to my parents who, I have to imagine, had better things to do than listen to my kindergarten, artistic nonsense for an hour. 

Crayons and Crayola Markers may not be the cleanest or most efficient tools, but I miss my turkey handprints and the fairy tales doodled on my hand during math class daydreams. Often, I came home from school with wrists and forearms dotted with hot pinks and laced with electric blues.

My parents always told me I had something special, but what parent doesn’t think their child is the most special in the world? Once in second-grade art class, I refused to follow directions. I glued my construction paper leaves falling off the tree rather than remaining on the branches like everyone else. My teacher smiled when I turned in my project. Bending the rules had earned my piece’s place the Principal’s selection, displayed with my name in big letters underneath.

Growing older shifted my artistic style from sidewalk chalk and fantasy to a brooding, looming mist. My best friend Jenny and I were a package deal. Losing her to a cross-country move shattered me like a porcelain vase tumbling to concrete. I felt like the chaotic greens and reds of an incoming squall line on the local news weather radar. After some time, the storm and my shock passed. Left in its wake were toppled trees and discarded roofs of my heart.

Junior year was my hardest, and navigating it alone without my partner in crime overwhelmed me. Classes that once came easily and were fun because of her only reminded me of my loss. I didn’t know how to make new friends. My grades and mental health had begun to decline, and I had no interest in therapy. I still hadn’t accepted that she’d gone, but painting helped. It was my emotional outlet.

My canvas is my safe place to explore my depression without judgment. I don’t want to answer a million questions about what I’m feeling and why. I want to be left alone with my color palette and canvas, so I painted. I painted a lot.

My first pieces featured muted blues and smooth strokes that symbolized the pain and sadness of losing someone close to you. As my emotions evolved, so did my visual expressions. I experimented with abstract expressionism to communicate my convictions and values.

My most significant work was a self-portrait. I framed my face with a blue and teal base, a nod to my previous works and a somber undertone without detracting from the emotional center: anger. I’m wearing dark clothes covered head-to-toe, signifying my refusal to be vulnerable or ask for help. I’m holding an extinguished match, a symbol of my social and academic burnout.

My favorite part, and what catches most reader’s eye upon initial inspection, is a number 1 over my left eye. The “1” is the only clear aspect amongst the wild, angry strokes. Without Jenny, I felt alone in my depression.

My self-portrait is haunting, and it’s my pride. I dedicated around 30 foreground layers over many months, offering contrast that distinguishes it from other components. I deployed watered down paint, palette knife scratches, spatter paint techniques, and paint brushes to create a chaotic, but visually pleasing piece.

I made the difficult choice to compete in the Texas VASE competition. My painting is extremely private, but I recognized that showcasing my self-portrait as an opportunity to “come out” about my feelings and struggles. I made VASE State sophomore year with a less expressive piece, so I feared the extensive interview with art professionals.

On competition day, I entered, trembling, painting in hand. I felt intimidated yet undeterred. I stood firm, looked her in her eyes, and spoke directly about my recent depression. To my surprise, she remarked my piece was beautiful and encapsulated everything she was looking for. Rattling off my composition choices and inspirations made me slowly realize that maybe my darkest emotions produced something brilliant.

Days passed until my art teacher emailed me. My jaw dropped; I qualified for state in the highest division. Emboldened, I wasn’t afraid to share my journey and encourage other students to express their emotions through art. I eventually received all-state honors, so I used my platform to demonstrate that it's okay to embrace and share your darkest sides. My piece now hangs prominently at school as a reminder to my classmates and teachers that we can transform dark, painful experiences into beautiful and inspiring works of art.

Major Short Answer

I spent a lot of time in the “art-closet” under the stairs at my house. It was my haven. For hours on end, I plucked various fabrics from the bin and created a work of art for my little sister to show off with pride. My mind flooded with ideas that I converted into an over-the-shoulder dress with gold stitching and a rhinestone belt, my greatest creation. I dragged my parents into the living room for fashion shows with colored lights and funky music for effect. Seeing my creation move and walk in a small setting burnished the idea of a fashion career in my mind. I wanted to spend my life in the fashion industry.

I’ve also been surrounded by business my whole childhood. My father is a CFO, and my mom is a business-executive assistant. Watching my father build tech-startups from the ground up and listening to their work chatter about mergers and acquisitions sparked my interest. My dad is always patient with my many questions. I’ve learned the ins and outs of business management and finance. I’m good enough with numbers and statistics, but my true passion is art. I think it’s possible to combine both.

The University of Texas at Austin offers world-class professors and programs where I can learn, work, and thrive. My dream job is being a global business executive for a major fashion label. I need business skills to make this happen. I also intend to take Textiles and Apparel electives and art classes for non-majors. I hope to contribute to UT’s annual Fashion Show at the Frank Erwin Center.

The McCombs Business School’s approach allows me to explore each facet of business to eventually chose one for my final major. I audited a business law class with Professor Robert Prentice where we spent the day learning about Title IV of the 1964 Civil Rights Act. The class was absolutely fascinating. I enjoyed sitting with so many diverse students that all added their own twist to the class through their questions and responses. I’m confident that McCombs Business will prepare me for a fantastic career in the fashion industry.

Leadership Short Answer

My freshman year, our marching band was one of the best in the district. We routinely made the finals in marching competitions and won the overall title. After another successful year, to our surprise and dismay, our long-time band director resigned. Our school’s administration hired an outside candidate rather than promoting the lead assistant director who subsequently resigned.

Losing two band directors who transformed us into state-level competitors year-after-year lowered morale and fractured the sections. The upperclassmen we counted on for leadership were upset, increasing the division. Many members quit, reducing the band to fewer than 100 marchers on the field. We no longer had the size, strength, or experience to compete with the other marching bands in our district.

Dropping from a perennial powerhouse to not advancing to finals was a bitter pill to swallow. I was disappointed with how the band reacted to the new directors teaching style, which was completely different than before. I stuck with it, determined to step up and make a positive difference.

I auditioned for and was thankful to be chosen for drum major at the end of my sophomore year. As drum major, I maintained the structure and organization under an unpopular director. I’m accountable to our staff for the success of our band as a unit, and I was ready for the challenge.

From the first day of summer band, I led by example. I challenged the section leaders to work together to lift the band’s morale and improve our performance. I embraced the new director’s marching style and focused on helping the band improve. The transformation took time and hard work, but the results came over the long season as the band’s morale and performance improved.

The prior year’s negativity was a distant memory when we got straight 1s at UIL and advanced to the finals in our last competition of the year. As senior drum major, I hope to pass on this legacy for the successive leaders to drive to maintain a new winning culture that was achieved through hard work and collaboration. With this mindset our band will be prepared to tackle any issue brought upon us, now and in the future.

Diversity Short Answer

7:00 sharp. Eddie pulls up with his adorable dog Echo and orders the usual: two skinny cinnamon dolce lattes. Thirty minutes later, like clockwork, Susan orders her signature venti latte with an extra shot and four raw sugars before her heading to her desk job in Bevo City. I greet with a smile our Starbucks regulars who start their morning commutes at our drive-thru.

Most of my coworkers despise mornings, especially at the drive-thru window, but it’s my favorite shift. Serving their favorite drinks and brightening their mornings with a joke or a “how ya doing?” makes my day fly by. For some of my customers, it might be the only smile or small talk they receive for the day.

The drive-thru window is my portal to the world living in such a culturally-diverse suburb. Each person, like their drink order, is different and unique. It’s uncanny how stern faces tend to go for double espressos while the bubbly types with time on their hands sip frappuccinos. My tender and energetic personality resembles my go-to beverage: iced caramel macchiato with extra vanilla and caramel drizzle.

I love the morning routines and regulars who stop by, but every hour at Starbucks is different. I give quiet customers their space, yet I never pass on an opportunity to chat. I’ve learned perspectives at work I wouldn’t get from home or school. You never know when a two-minute conversation might reveal something special or thought-provoking.  I chat with Danny and his girlfriend. They seem to have the kind of relationship I’d like. Eric never forgets to tell me to vote even if we’re nowhere near an election. Over months and months, new people become regulars. Being a barista is one of my most rewarding experiences.

Plan II Short Answer

Retailers like Forever 21 and H&M introduce new designs every few weeks. Disposable fast fashion requires high volume, rapid lead times, and low prices to satiate consumer desires. A single cotton t-shirt can require up to 2,700 liters of water to produce. Microfibers, which are shed by garments during washing, dramatically contribute to the plastic accumulation in our oceans. Fossil fuels power industrial machinery that contributes to local pollution and increases greenhouse gas emissions.

Factory workers and source suppliers in the developing world suffer from long hours, low pay, and harmful work conditions. Human Rights Watch estimates that around 40 million people work in modern slavery conditions in sweatshops worldwide. Fast fashion and the $2.4 trillion dollar garments industry is emblematic of the exploitative relationship of global capitalism that maximizes the profits of multinational corporations at the expense of the Global South. Forever 21 recently declared bankruptcy due to a lack of demand, so I know advocacy and adjusting personal habits make a difference.

Plan II’s two semesters of required non-US History will expose me to the history of colonialism and how the past shapes our contemporary world order. A liberal-arts approach to economics will allow me to explore its influence on mainstream globalization. I look forward to taking honors anthropology coursework to develop varied perspectives and understand the world through the eyes of a factory worker or impoverished woman living far from a city. An interdisciplinary education will provide me the tools to look at the effects of social and economic issues like fast fashion.

Plan II Five sentences

1.     I am a self-taught artist who didn’t take a formal art class until my sophomore year of high school.

2.     I always win our band’s March Madness bracket. 

3.     I started a YouTube channel as a kid, and my favorite video involved my best friend Becca and me playing the “7 Second Challenge.” 

4.     I love the cinematography and 1920s Art Deco aesthetic in my favorite movie La La Land.

5.     I lived in sixteen different houses in the same city with my mom due to divorce and her love for interior design.

Admissions Results/Analysis

Review thoughts: Thoughtful and sincere applicant who demonstrates a high level of leadership particularly in the arts. Their Essay A tracing their development as an artist from childhood through to qualifying for VASE State demonstrates how the journey is just as if not more important than the destination. Using art as a vehicle for introspection and social change elevates their accomplishment beyond the resume. The most challenging part of their essay was illustrating their state-winning self-portrait knowing that the reviewer won’t ever see the painting (unless they clicked on an image link in the resume). Developing not just the image itself but the design process suggests to the reviewer that they’re willing to put in the work to convert their ideas into creative output.

Their Essay A also sets up their Major essay about pivoting from visual art to fashion design. I especially like their Diversity short answer, again providing context to their resume as more than a part-time job at Starbucks. Their Plan II essay also ties everything together by demonstrating the analytical capability to identify a problem and propose solutions and how a Plan II education can help them explore further their interests. It’s also one thing to be a drum major in a high achieving band with stability and continuity between years and another to occupy leadership roles when morale is low and uncertainty is high. Sticking with the activity when others are quitting suggests resilience and seeing through their commitments.

Despite having academics below average for the typical Plan II admitted student, they gained admission early largely on the strength of their essays. It isn’t too surprising that they didn’t receive a BHP interview because their process is much more driven by having almost perfect academics at a minimum and resumes loaded with leadership experiences. I appreciate that Plan II looks at more subjective criteria to pick out talented students potentially overlooked by other most-selective programs.

Admissions Score Probabilities:

One:  0%

Two:  0%

Three:  0%

Four:  10%

Five:  50%

Six:  40%

Likely score: 5.5

Decision: Admit early to McCombs and Plan II, No BHP Interview

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